


smother.

by romanticsteggy



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Car Accidents, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Bucky Barnes, Self-Indulgent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-19
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:20:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24812209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romanticsteggy/pseuds/romanticsteggy
Summary: tony steps in after an accident until bucky can take over. both are just a bit overbearing
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader, Tony Stark & Reader
Comments: 4
Kudos: 81





	smother.

The adrenaline and shock kept you from fully being in the moment. The whole incident felt like a hazy memory, like it happened years ago and your brain was just now allowing you to gather all the pieces. In reality, everything had happened no more than an hour ago. 

An hour ago, you had been humming an old pop song and drumming your fingers against your steering wheel. You had just run to the store to grab something to make for dinner, and we’re on your way back to the Compound.

You were sick of ordering in and wanted something not wrapped in cellophane or in a styrofoam container. With Bucky gone, you were known to revert back into your old bachelorette days, where you drank more wine coolers than water and lived off of take out and only wore your favorite nightie. 

An hour ago, when you were listening to The Spice Girls, thinking about the carbonara ingredients in the backseat, and the podcast you wanted to listen to while making it as you drove through an intersection. It had all happened before you could comprehend anything. It had happened so quick, so unexpectedly, that your mind was missing the exact moment of impact.

An hour ago your head pounded with rushing blood and your eyes spilled over with tears. Your car had been thrust onto its side from the crash, your seatbelt dug into your skin as your body hung against it. You breathing had become so rapid, you were sure you would faint at any moment.

An hour ago, you had been pried from your crumpled vehicle, damaged beyond repair from the roll it had done on the asphalt, by a helpful bystander. The nice woman who had witnessed the scene tried her best to talk you down from hysterics, her phone pressed between her shoulder and her cheek as she called the authorities. 

An hour ago you heard sirens and the horn of a fire engine. 

Just an hour ago firefighters and paramedics had come to your rescue, asking questions your brain couldn’t comprehend as you stared at the remains of your car. Your oh so beloved old car you’d had since college.

You felt like you were underwater, swaying where the current and nurses took you, unable to hear their diagnosis or what they wanted you to do. It wasn’t until the pain meds flowing through your IV kicked in that the fog clouding your mind lifted enough for you to listen to the doctor.

“It’s definitely a concussion. Not one severe enough to keep you here for evaluation, but a bad concussion nonetheless. Brain injuries are no joke and should be taken seriously,” He stated, stepping away from you as you blink away the spot in your vision from the bright light that he had just swayed between your eyes. 

“The scrapes and bruises will heal with time, and the stitches will dissolve on their own.” 

You let your fingers lightly touch the gash on your forehead, running them over the tips of black thread. You almost forgot that a nurse had put three little knots into your skin when you first arrived. 

“It will most likely scar, but I think that should be the least of your worries.” The doctor continued absentmindedly as he walked to the end of your bed to return your chart. 

As he turned to wash his hands, you noted that his bedside manor was lacking.

“All in all, you were lucky. I have to say you got off easy this time, Miss (Y/L/N).” 

This time. 

Presumably, the doctor meant nothing by this. You were certainly misinterpreting, but you couldn’t shake the poor phrasing. 

This time. This time. This time. 

“I see no need to keep you overnight. A nurse will come in to tie up some odds and ends, but then we will be done here. We can release you once someone is here to drive you home.” The doctor said. 

“Oh, I can just take a cab. I feel fine.” You really didn’t want to wake anyone at this hour. 

The clock on the wall told you it was nearing one in the morning.

“With your concussion, I wouldn’t feel right letting you do so. As I said, a concussion is nothing to take lightly. I’ll have a nurse call the emergency contact we have for you on file.” 

At this words you stiffen. 

Bucky would be the only person worse to contact at this moment, your emergency contact was a close second. 

You thank the doctor as he left, then deflate against the thin pillows behind you. You barely had time to prepare yourself before you heard a clamoring down the hall. You knew exactly who it was. With the quick timing of his arrival, he no doubt flew a fucking helicopter here. Or God forbid, one of his suits. 

One moment he was making a commotion in the hallway, the next he was standing in your doorway, face flushed and chest heaving. 

“Scare me half to death, why don’t you?” Tony let out a loud breath before coming to your bedside, pulling you into a hug.

“Sorry, my phone shattered or I would have texted.” You mumble, embarrassed by your imposition. 

“I’ll have a new one for you by morning,” Tony pulled away and looked you over more thoroughly. 

“I’m alright, just a little banged up is all.” You shrug, uncomfortable under his scrutinizing gaze.

“Just a little banged up, huh?” Tony said sarcastically, flicking your stitches lightly with his finger. 

“Coulda been a lot worse. Even the doctor said how lucky I was.” You tried to reassure him, though it was hard in your current scared, meek state. 

“Since the second I laid eyes on you, all I can think about is how lucky you are. They don’t tell you the severity of the incident on the phone, y’know?” Tony chided. 

“I’m sorry.” You furrowed your brow the best you could.

Tony gave another deep sigh, “No, hey. No apologies, alright? I’m just so fucking happy you’re alright.” 

Your lips pulled into a half smile, still uncomfortable with the worry and burden you’d cast upon Tony.

“Let’s just get you the hell out of here.” 

You started to scoot off the bed when your muscles started to protest your movements. You audibly hissed. 

“Hey, easy, kid, easy.” Tony said, his arm coming around your waist to hold you study. 

“Just a little stiff,” You replied, trying to walk through your ache and exhaustion. 

Tony led you to the hallway with a hand on your back and the other holding your hand to keep you firmly on two feet. Once you turn the corner from your room, you were faced with a mousy looking nurse. She was the one you assumed Tony had been screaming at earlier by her shy demeanor. In front of her was an old blue wheelchair, and you scowled. 

“No fucking way.” You said sternly.

“Get in the chair, (Y/N).” Tony said, already moving you into it, having no time for your stubbornness. 

“Come on, seriously? I said I was ok!”

“It’s hospital policy that you leave in a wheelchair, actually.” The nurse timidly chimed. 

“See? So suck it up.” Tony said as he forcibly guided you into the low seat. 

You plopped down in the wheelchair against your own volition with a grumble. 

“Are you going to continue to baby me, Ms. Nightingale?” You snark as Tony took the handles from the nurse and began to wheel you to the exit. 

He couldn’t help but chuckle, happy you were coming back to life, “Until he gets home, yeah. You know my part is going to be a cake walk compared to RoboCop’s.” 

“Don’t remind me.” You sigh, slouching in the chair as Tony wheeled you toward the exit. 

xx

Continuing his self appointed duties as your nurse, Tony insisted you stay with him and Pepper until Bucky and the others got back. He didn’t even bother taking you to The Compound, just took you straight to his home. You had reiterated you were fine on your own, but let him move you into one of the extravagant guest rooms anyway without much fuss. Secretly, you liked that Tony was offering to look after you. You were still skittish and achy, being alone in the large compound would only make things worse. 

The morning after the accident, you woke to Pepper bringing you breakfast in bed. Her strawberry locks were tied loosely out of her face as she smiled warmly down at you. She wasn’t your own mother or a supersoldier with a metal arm, but having her with you made you relax. You had always adored her. 

“My legs do work, you know?” You joke, rolling stiffly to you back to face her. 

“Yes, but he’s being quite persistent about how you need to be taken care of. The racks of clothes and beauty products that will be coming this afternoon only prove it.” She chuckles, reaching over to your breakfast and stealing a grape. 

You shook your head. Tony had mentioned last night about sending someone to the tower to gather your things. Finding out he had actually just bought you a new array of items did not surprise you. You and Tony had always bonded over your love of shopping and new beautiful possessions. 

“Well, the best thing to come out of this is a new wardrobe and breakfast in bed, I’ll quit my whining.” You slowly went to reach for the tall glass of juice when your arm tensed. 

Pepper quickly jumped to action and obtained the glass for you, meeting your hand in the air to give you the cup. Her hands hovered around yours as you drank, cupping the air in case you were to drop it.

“I know you keep saying you’re fine, but I really feel like-” You cut her off. 

“Pepper, I swear, I am ok. Just sore and a little scared of motor vehicles. I’ll be normal and back on my feet in no time.” You smile tightly at her, your lips doing nothing to convince her of your words. 

“Well, if you’re not, FRIDAY is always here too-” Again, you cut off her worries. 

“Pepper! Come on, I don’t need everyone fussing over me. I am gonna be just fine.” You slouch against the pillows like a petulant child.

Pepper just nods, saying nothing more on the subject and pushed a strand of hair behind your ear. Lovingly. Motherly. 

You both changed the subject to gossip while you both ate your extravagant breakfast. When the food was cold and picked over, you expected her to leave. But as she moved the tray to the night stand, Pepper settled on the bed beside you. She claimed that she wanted an excuse to take the morning off, but she was staying for you. To keep an eye on you, to keep you company. 

And you welcomed her. 

xx

Four days since the accident, and your bruises were fading from purple to a sickly yellow. The pain in your muscles was present, making their ache known if you straightened your arm too far or raised it too high or if you moved your neck too quickly. The pain wasn’t as excruciating as it had been on the first day, but it was still persistent. You hoped in a week there would only be a whisper of discomfort to remind you of the accident. 

Your scrapes were scabbing over and your forehead no longer protruded from the impact. Your stitches were still intact but would likely begin to dissolve soon. Your ego prickled with vanity at the idea of having a scar on your face, but luckily it was near your hairline and (hopefully) hideable.

You had looked much more gruesome the first two days, battered, bloodied and bruised. Now, your injuries had lessened to blisters, the halo of bruising and the occasional complaint about extremity pain. 

Though right now, your pain was far from your mind. Your main worry was Bucky. Tony had joked about cutting your bangs so Bucky would be none the wiser about your injuries when he returned in a few weeks, and since then, you couldn’t keep his reaction off your mind. 

You knew he would be angry, confused and protective when he finally came home. He was going to blame himself, blame Tony, blame the universe and the New York City city planning committee. He was going to wrap you in bubble wrap and likely live in a tense, pitiful silence before you got his true feelings about what had happened to the surface. 

You weren’t looking forward to it. 

You wished for more reasons than one, that he had just been home when this accident occurred. If he had been, there would have been a good chance that it would have never even happened. 

You would have just ordered take out because if he was home you wouldn’t have had your fill of it. Or you would have gone grocery shopping earlier in the week together to plan your meals. Or you would have gone a few floors down to have dinner with Nat and Steve.

You wished he had just been home to hold you and comfort you and kiss you better all over. You knew he would have swept in a storm to the hospital, one that not even Tony could match… but at least his anger and worry would have crested and ended. Now you just had to sit and wait for his return, something that was already an awful experience pre-accident. 

When Bucky went on long missions (or short, who were you kidding?) it was heart wrenching to be away from him for so long. You were riddled with anguish and lovelorn sadness. Now? Now, it was like every lonely, morosse thought you had while he was away was amplified. 

Tony’s home was beautiful and he was plying you with anything and everything you could ever dream of, but nothing compared to just being held by your Bucky Barnes. He made you feel safe, cared for and so loved. He made everything better just with his presence. 

At night when your brain would decide to relive the accident in vivid detail or worse, putting you in peril that hadn’t happened, you longed for Bucky’s embrace. You needed him so bad, even if the initial fallout would be messy.

You had become quite alarmable as another side effect of the accident. Loud noises made you tense and broken silence made you jump. Your nightmares and loneliness keeping you up at night did nothing to help your unease.

Tony began to notice your new behavior after you broke a plate when he entered the kitchen without announcing himself first. He unfortunately recognized himself in your actions. Your restless hands, your darting eyes, your increased intakes of breath. 

When he had first brought you home, he had asked FRIDAY to monitor your progress and vitals just in case you took a turn in the night while he slept. From FRIDAY’s reports, you were physically healing wonderfully, but your breathing and heart rate were elevated and erratic. Tony knew the kind of turmoil you were living and he was heartbroken that your mind had waged war on itself. He began to speak to you softly, increasing the weight of his steps so you’d always know where he was, he’d place a comforting hand on your knee to know that you were safe. He even went to The Compound and brought back a few of Bucky’s things to help you feel more secure in your stay. 

Tony loved his reputation of being an aloof playboy, but he knew that wasn’t so true anymore. Powerful women (two in particular) and a small boy from Queens had shaved away parts of his hard exterior. He was going soft. As much as he complied about it, Tony was fine with this. As long as not too many people saw. 

xx

As the Quinjet landed, Bucky vibrated with excitement. All fatigue seemingly disappeared from his body the second he laid eyes on the Compound. He had texted you while boarding the jet that things had thankfully wrapped up early and he was on his way home! When he sent the message, it had already been late, so he was left unsurprised that you hadn’t replied. 

Bucky loved having you wait in the hanger for him, watching your face glow with anticipation and grin when you finally laid eyes on him. But, he also enjoyed the element of surprise after a mission. Tip toeing into your room and laying gentle kisses against your skin before you woke and wound yourself around him, your warm soft skin inviting him home. 

Once it was safe to exit the jet, Bucky gathered his things as he made mindless small talk with Steve. The others were long gone, their sleep deprivation mattering more than gear, leaving Bucky and his best friend to walk from the hangar to the elevator alone. They pressed the button for the main Compound living space and continued to chat. While their exhaustion rivaled some of their teammates, both super soldiers were always starved after a mission. A post mission meal had become a tradition for the two (add or subtract two clingy girlfriends depending on the situation).

As both men got off the elevator and made their way for the kitchen, FRIDAY’s voice chimed overhead.

“Sergeant Barnes, it was requested of me to inform you when you got in, that Miss (Y/L/N) is not here.” 

“She at the store or somethin’?” Bucky asks, setting down one of his duffle bags. 

“No, she is currently staying with Mr. Stark.”

Bucky and Steve exchanged a confused look.

“Uh, why?” Bucky asks, more puzzled than anything.

The AI gave a long pause, one that made Bucky’s heart twinge with fear. 

“Mr. Stark said to not inform you of the nature of her stay, since he believed you would freak the hell out.”

Bucky’s eyes widen and bile crept up his throat. 

What had happened? Were you ok? Was something terribly wrong? Were you leaving him? 

Bucky wouldn’t let his brain spin anymore possibilities, he just turned right around and hit the elevator button with a rapid succession. 

“Buck, maybe just wait till morning…” Steve tried to reason, seeing how ridgid Bucky’s posture had become.

Bucky said nothing, just continued to hit the glowing button impatiently. 

“Buck, it’s late. If she’s with Tony everything’s got to be fine. He would never let anything bad happen to her.” Steve spoke softly. 

“How the fuck am I supposed to know that? Or anything else! I dont know fucking anything about what’s going on! I don’t know if she’s hurt or scared or hating me! I don’t know shit! All I know is where she is and that I fucking miss her, alright?” He snapped. 

His unresponded text seemed more significant than it had before.

Steve’s face fell as he listened to Bucky speak. His voice was firm, yet it wavered with fear. He knew that Bucky was in no state to be driving, even if it was only ten minutes to Stark’s place. Also, if Tony was keeping you from Bucky, things were going to get ugly. It would do both men well if a mediator was present. 

“Okay, okay. I get it. But let me drive. You get tunnel vision when you’re like this.” Steve said, watching the elevator doors open and Bucky get inside. 

Bucky said nothing, but didn’t stop Steve as he joined him in the elevator, hitting the garage button as he did. 

xx

FRIDAY had informed Tony of the Team’s early arrival and of Bucky’s reaction to the vague news. He knew before the AI even mentioned it, that Bucky would be on his way over, with Steve in tow. So, he rubbed the sleep from his eyes, kissed Pepper on the forehead, and went to wait in the living room, pouring the three of them glasses of scotch for their arrival. Tony was nursing his own when Bucky burst in. 

“Stark? Where the fuck are you?” He bellowed. 

When Bucky rounded the corner to the living room, Tony swore his eyes were red. 

“C3PO, Luke,” Tony nodded to both men as they entered, “What can I do for you at this ungodly hour?” 

“Where is she?” The whirl from Bucky’s arm was deafening. 

“Leia? On Alderaan no doubt.” Tony commented, before picking up a glass of scotch to hand to Bucky. 

Was it wrong for Tony to antagonize him right now? Of course, but Bucky had woken him up from a dead sleep at three in the morning, he was owed a few good jabs. 

“Tony, not now.” Steve said with slumping shoulders. He was way too tired to deal with this right now. 

“Oh, do you mean (Y/N)?” Tony said in fake realisation, snapping his fingers. 

“I swear to God, I will end you, Stark.” Bucky growled deep in his chest.

“Empty threats, Tobor.” Tony snarked. 

“If you don’t tell me where the hell she is and quick, this is going to get a lot uglier!” Bucky’s voice was back to ricashaying off the walls as he took a deadly step forward. 

His teeth were bared and Tony was honestly surprised he wasn’t frothing at the mouth. 

“What’s going on?” A small voice sounded from the left of the men. 

All their heads snapped to the side to see you, in nothing but one of Bucky’s henley’s and a pair of his boxer shorts, rubbing your eye with the heel of your palm. 

“Oh thank God,” Bucky’s voice was barely a whisper as he ran toward you, scooping you into his arms.

He clung to you as tight as he could. You usually would have let him wrap you in this bone crushing hug, but you were still healing and an involuntary yelp left your mouth as he hugged you. Bucky loosened his grasp enough to inspect why you had made the pained noise when he finally saw it. 

Saw you up close without overwhelming relief clouding his vision. The split lip, the yellow dusting around your temple. He took a step back to see similar dark marks on your arms and legs, that no doubt covered your skin. Bucky looked back at your face with a horrified expression. Expecting the worse from the bruising, he moved your hair from your face and felt his stomach churn and his knees weaken. 

You watched Bucky’s face drain with color before your eyes. His grip on your face was tight as he watched him try to find his words. 

“Before you say anything, I’m fine.” You smiled, trying to get out in front of his freak out. 

It didn’t help. 

Bucky whipped around, one arm coming behind him to hold you protectively to his back. 

“What did you do?” Bucky hissed at Tony.

“Me? How the hell do I get the blame for this?” Tony’s eyebrows shot up his forehead. 

“Because I left and she was fine, and now I come back and she’s with you and covered in bruises.” Bucky gripped you closer to his back primily. 

“I think covered is a bit of an over statement.” You chimed in. 

Your comment went disregarded as Bucky and Tony fought back and forth. 

You were doing your best to calm Bucky down, stroke his back, burrow your nose to the nape of his neck, coo to him sweetly. But nothing worked, his hold on you was still unbreakable and his anger was increasing. It wasn’t until Steve had finally had enough that things started to calm down. 

“Why don’t you ask her what happened, Buck!” His stern voice contoured the other mens and they fell silent. 

Still doing his best to hold you, Bucky turned to face you, his expression immediately softening.

You just smiled reassuringly and brought your hands up to cup his cheeks affectionately. Bucky practically whimpered at your touch and reveled in the feeling. 

“First of all, I want to say how much I missed you. We kinda skipped over that part.” You said delicately as you ran your thumbs over his cheek bones.

“I missed you too.” Bucky spoke tenderly, all but forgetting the two other men who were watching your reunion. 

Your smile grew briefly before falling off your lips, “I got t-boned while I was driving a few days ago- a week in two days, actually.” 

Bucky’s anxiety and panic was tangible in your close proximity, his features beginning to scrunch together. You paused your story to press a sweet kiss to cheek, whispering your love to his skin. You felt him relax slightly, and that was good enough for you to continue. 

“An ambulance took me to the hospital, where a doctor told me I have a concussion, but nothing that is life altering or threatening. Everything you see will heal on its own and the stitches will dissolve with time. After he cleared me, Tony came to get me and had me stay with him while you guys were all on the mission just in case I needed something, or just some company.” Your explanation seemed to calm him a bit more, but you could tell he wasn’t completely sold.

“I promise you, the worst part about this whole thing was Nurse Ratched over there,” You joked.

“I’m sorry? Were you throwing water fountains out of any windows to escape this palace?” 

“Tony? Not now.” You looked around Bucky, your nose wrinkled, before looking back at Bucky.

“I am perfectly fine. A little worse for wear, but all in all, just fine. I promise.” 

“I should have been here, doll, I just, I should have been here.” Bucky said quickly, his eyes searching yours for forgiveness he didn’t need. 

“Don’t do that to yourself. It happened, it was bad, but now it’s over and now you’re here. That’s all that matters.” You smiled sadly at your own words. 

“This isn’t just bad, this is horrible! This is a nightmare for me, baby. You get that right?” He said wildly.

“I know. I know, but everything is fine.”

Bucky breathed loudly out his nose before he came to rest his forehead to yours, “I can’t, I don’t… I just…” His words hung awkwardly in the air. 

You knew this wasn’t a conversation that needed to be had in front of other people, so you broke away. 

“I’m going to grab my phone, then we’ll head home, alright?”

Bucky nodded, eyes glazed over in thought. 

You weren’t surprised when Bucky followed you up to the guest room. You knew you weren’t going to leave his sight for a while, not that you minded. 

xx

The car was silent as the three of you drove back to the Compound. Steve acted as chauffeur for you and Bucky, who sat with you in the backseat. He insisted on buckling you both in and sat in the middle seat to keep you in his arms the whole way back. 

When you arrived, Steve bid you both a farewell and opted to take the stairs rather than the elevator with the two of you. He knew you needed some privacy. 

Once the doors shut and the lift began to move, Bucky burst into tears. You were still wrapped in his vice grip against his chest and couldn’t pull away to console him. 

“Baby, hey, stop. It’s ok, everything is alright.” You cooed to the side of his neck. 

Bucky hiccuped and shook his head as he walked you back against the wall. He crowded you into the corner of the elevator and slipped his hands under your (his) t-shirt. 

You hushed him, kissing his exposed skin and gently stroking his back as he sniffled and cried around you. 

When the doors finally opened, you thought Bucky would let up. But he didn’t. He just picked you up easily by your thighs and you wrapped them around his hips as he walked you both to your shared room. He was still crying, but it was quieter now. You wished you could say something, anything, to calm him, but it seemed just having you close was the best way to keep him together. 

As you entered the bedroom, Bucky shut the door with his foot and b-lined you both straight to the bathroom. He set you on the side of the large, Stark issued soaking tub, and started the water. Now that he had let you go, Bucky made sure some part of his body was touching yours as he fussed with the water temperature.

“Buck, let’s just-” But he cut you off.

“Baby, please. Just… just let me.” He shut his eyes and set his jaw as he spoke. 

You just nodded and leaned over to kiss his shoulder as he continued with his bath prep.

He had been angry and now he had moved onto coddling. He needed to know you were safe and close and taken care of. 

And you’d let him. 

When the bath was ready, Bucky stripped from his white t-shirt, tackle pants and boots before moving onto your (again, his) clothes. He handled you like something so delicate and breakable, you’d be offended if you didn’t already know he meant nothing offensive by it. 

Bucky stepped into the bath first and held out both his arms to guide you safe and study into the water. When you were both settled under the warm water, Bucky pulled you back to him. He placed his nose behind your ear and wrapped one arm tightly around your stomach and the other around your chest. His fingers stretched and explored your skin in soothing motions as he rubbed his nose and cheeks to your neck. 

You hummed contently and relaxed against his form as he did. You swore, Bucky was a wolf in another life with all his face rubbing and primal urges and instincts he had. You not so secretly loved it. His obvious affections always made you feel loved. 

After Bucky had let his fingertips examine every inch of your bare skin, scarred and smooth, and had suitable reason to truly believe that you were OK, you heard him sigh. 

“You’re really sure you’re fine?” He said, lips still pressed to your neck. 

“Yes, of course. Everything physical will heal.”

“Physical?” 

Shit. 

You were going to wait to mention the mental strain you had been under. At least until Bucky’s original panic had calmed substantially (or until you had a nightmare). 

“Well, I just… I mean that I’ll heal and everything will be peachy in a week or two.” You tried to delude.

“You know you can’t lie to me, baby.” His voice was pained and tired and God, it broke you even more. 

You knew he just wanted to help… you just hated to trouble him. 

“I know.” You slumped further into his embrace, “I just hate worrying you.” 

“If you’re allowed to worry about me, I am sure as hell allowed to worry about you.” He replied. 

“Touche.” 

“So?” 

“So… it’s been hard, y’know? I just, fuck… I can’t stop replaying that night in my head over and over and over. I keep thinking about if I had left the store a minute later or a minute sooner, none of this would have happened.” You frown. 

“And, I can’t stop jumping. I’m so fucking on edge. I shattered a plate the other day when I didn’t hear Tony enter the kitchen and he asked me a question. He spoke and I jumped out of my skin and dropped the plate. It was so embarrassing… and I have had a couple of nightmares…” 

“Oh, baby.” Bucky frowned, huddling closer to you. 

“And honestly, I didn’t even realise how annoying this all sounds until right now,” It was at this moment you realized you had started to cry, “Because I am bitching and moaning about this when you have been through-”

“Hey, no. I’m not even gonna let you finish. We aren’t going to compare trauma. You and I don’t play the suffering olympics, do we?” He said sternly. 

“No, we don’t.” 

His words echo ones you had said time and again when Bucky went through a rough patch. You always held him up, supported him no matter the topic or the hour, was there for him no matter what. Bucky just wanted to do the same. 

“That’s right. We don’t. Because different things are allowed to be sad, pain is relative and pain is still pain no matter the severity.” 

You put on a watery smile and snuggle closer to him, “I didn’t know you listened to my words that closely.” 

He had said one of your favorite phrases to say to him word for word. It felt weird being on the receiving end of your own advice. 

“Of course I do. You helped heal me. You stopped my bleeding and got me help. You are my saving grace, baby girl. I listen to everything you say.” Bucky says sincerely. 

You twist around to look at his face, leaning against his chest to look up at him. The tears in your eyes are mirrored in his own. He looked down at you with such palpable love and adoration, it made you tremble.

“I love you.” 

“I love you, too baby. So much and forever.”

“This is why Sam says you’re whipped.” You cracked and Bucky chuckled. 

“Yeah, I hate when that fucker’s right.” He smiled and it was your turn to laugh. 

You’re both silent for a moment, and you settle in to be reclined against his chest, cheek to his peck. You close your eyes and Bucky presses a delicate kiss to your lips. One that makes your heart skip and your stomach flutter. 

“I need you to know that I’m gonna take care of you, OK? I am going to be here every step of the way. Until you’re better and long, long after that.” He says against your lips. 

“I know, me too.” 

“I know.” He smiles.

Bucky settles back against the tub and relaxes. He thinks about calling his therapist tomorrow to set you an appointment and burgridingly apologizing to Tony, he did look out for you after all. But he knows those things can wait for tomorrow as kisses your shoulder lovingly.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope u enjoyed! if you did, consider leaving a comment or kudo (: feedback is my life blood <333


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